Solitary Confinement
Being on my own
Is never easy
The long term thought
Makes me queasy
In deep conversation
With my solitary self
In everyday situations
People question my mental health
Cooking and eating alone
Is not much fun
Supermarkets cater for families
Everything’s more expensive to run
Lack of money doesn’t help
Unemployment brings despair
Illness, pain and lack of mobility
Yet the cupboards are bare
Sitting in an empty chair
Waiting for the phone to ring
Staring out the window in a daze
Listening to the birds sing
Aged without a family
My only company my TV
Waiting for door to door salesman
To knock and give me a little joviality
Confined to bed
My only daily contact
A short community nurse visit
My memories intact
If I had the chance
To live my life again
I’d be permanently jolly
And go out and find myself some friends
I wrote this poem because I'd locked myself away in a room for 8 months with depression. I wrote it in early May 2010. I broadened it out to also talk about being alone when you are old and physically infirm. The sadness in the poem eludes to the way I was feeling at the time, although I came out of my depressive phase by starting to write poetry again and being proud of myself again.
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